[ 11 Min Read ]
Again, congratulations for being brave and healthy! As renowned relational clinical psychologist, Dr. John Townsend reveals, “It's the healthy people who want to grow and guard their well-being while it's the sick who suffer apathy."
Bravely empowers the healthy, not the SICK: Shallow, Into-Lying, Cowardly, Know-it-all.
Research after research show, healthy people know they are NOT self-aware so they are vicious to ACE self-awareness. While the sick think they're self-aware, so they're ho-hum ho-hum.
"There are two kinds of people: The wise, who know they are fools, and fools who think they are wise." -Socrates
The healthy take a VERY proactive daily approach to their holistic success, while oppositely, the sick are reactive — always steps behind. So congratulations for being healthy!
You are here because you want to reach a better place: To power to what you want, and to prevent what you don't want. What areas of you do you want better? Financial, physical, relational, mental, emotional, spiritual? Choose your top 2 now. What is THE thing that can keep you stuck from reaching what you want?
One foggy night, two drunken sailors were walking out of a seaside bar to get back to their ship. As they walked alongside the boardwalk, they saw a row boat. Excitedly one sailor said, “I want to take a shortcut back! So let's borrow it and row across the bay to our ship instead of walking all the way around the island." Yes!, they both said. So they jumped into the little boat and started rowing feverishly — excitedly rowing and rowing and rowing.
When daylight came, they found themselves still in the row boat. And worse yet, they were still stuck at the dock. Confused, they looked at each other, then their surroundings. And they both sheepishly saw that in their drunken stupor and haste, they had forgotten their NEED — to untether the rope from the row boat to the dock.
Two lessons from the Sailors & Row Boat:
1. Slow down to speed up:
We must be brave enough to ace self-awareness, daily. To get out of the busy-busy rat race. So we can lead ourselves and others in the human race. Had the sailors been self-aware, they would have not wasted all their energy to go nowhere. The wise know, investing daily time to ace self-awareness is saving a lifetime of wasted opportunities and self-inflicted problems. For the wise, to ace self-awareness isn't a luxury, it's a necessity like air, food & water. And if you're a leader of team or home, there is NOTHING better for your people than you giving them the gift of self-awareness through Bravely.
2. You must untether the rope:
If you're not self-aware of THE rope, you can not untether it. What's THE rope that keeps you stuck at the dock of wants and doesn't let you reach your ship of gots? I call the rope, shame nature. Theologians calls it, your sin nature.
All humans suffer THE rope to certain degrees. The question is, is your rope so tied to the dock of wants — that it's creating high dysfunctions of STUCK in your life.
1. Self-Sufficiency Lie: We got acquainted with this—the deadliest lie in your ACE-10 Intro
2. Transgression: We know the things we should do but we rebel from doing them
3. Entitlement: Not living The Truth, and believing we're more "special" than others
4. Envy: "Oh, what they have is so much better than mine." "Oh, what I have is so much better"
Our shame nature enslaves us in self-deception & self-sabotage — thus breaking our relationships with The Truth ("Transcendental"), The Self ("Interpersonal") & Others ("Interpersonal").
"We are all so unique but our problems are so similar." -Andy Stanley
The woman with a great career but gets so many parking tickets because she has a rebellious heart. Worse yet, she doesn't pay them. Ends up with a warrant and gets taken to jail. So she hurts her career, and has to pay over $40K plus legal fees. Or Bernie Madoff who made hundreds of millions legally, but rebels against the law to steal tens of billions illegally. Elliott Spitzer, going after prostitutes with hard laws, but ends up breaking the those laws himself.
The Biggest Loser contestants ( the longest study on weight loss) had all the "experts", nutritionists, celebrity personal trainers, sports psychologists, and all the family support plus from millions of T.V viewers. The results?
All, gained their weight back and then some. Why? Nobody taught them about their shame nature of transgression which was eventually going to rebel against all the "shoulds" they were being told to do by the "experts".
We see the mega relapses above in EVERY effort people try to improve, from weight loss to wellness to "rehab & recovery" to nearly all "self-help" efforts. All, nearly 100% failure rates. Why? Never deals with our shame nature.
Not living by The Truth. The poor in physical, financial and/or relational person who knows that he must take responsibility and take the actions to become more enriched. But he believes "someone" should do it for him or puts off his action for tomorrow... Or someone not admitting they are STUCK: Being in a dysfunctional state for over 90 days, like a bad relationship, job, startup, etc. All these behaviors stem from not accepting The Truth.
Sophia Amoruso, the now befallen founder of once high flyer Nasty Gal. Went from a seller on eBay to an $250 million empire, only to self-sabotage it because she began to believe in the Self-Sufficiency Lie advice she wrote in her book, Girl Boss. Believing in her own lies caused Amoruso ( a smart woman) to create bad relationships and thus massive errors. Same went for now befallen Travis Kalanick, Elizabeth Holmes, Richard Fould, Me, etc. ect.
Comparing, comparing, comparing. Which leads to low emotional intelligence symptom No. 1: Overestimating or underestimating our abilities. Like, "Oh, they have more talent and skill than me. It's why they're successful and I'm not." Or "Why are people so slow and stupid. I'll just handle it myself. I can do it all anyways." "Oh, the neighbor's _____________________ is so much better (or not as good) as mine." A heart of envy leads us down two roads of relational destruction: 1. An arrogant, narcissistic person. 2. A highly insecure, feeling inadequate person.
Have you ever, in frustration, asked, " Why can't I ( or they ) stop doing _______________________? Why can't I (or they), even knowing what should be done—don't do it?" Well, now you know, it's the shame nature. But knowing it won't help you. Until you ace self-awareness THE rope will always tie you down, and you will not be the boss of it. Like those drunken sailors, only acing your self-awareness will put you in charge of THE rope.
The shame nature controls 95% of all your behaviors. Yet, I have never seen it taught by the status quo "helping" companies nor is the shame nature taught by the vast majority of life scientists nor in church nor schools. Why?
For the last two centuries, brain scientists have mostly focused on our neocortex, frontal brain. This is our most surface thinking, like where we think about Wants. But have you ever looked back in your life and said, "Why the heck did I do that, what the heck was I thinking!!?" Of course you have, we all have. Why? Because you weren't thinking but desiring & feeling from your shame nature which unconsciously triggered your behavior.
Science has just began to delve into this in this past year. Good news is that here at Bravely we have not only been studying our deepest desires in our shame nature for almost 10 years, but have figured out how to empower you to untether it. In ACE-10 we dig deep into your subcortex AND your heart: The places of your deepest desires & feelings (about 165 of them), emotions (love & fear). Here, quite self-unaware, is where you make 95% of your decisions. In your heart and subcortex is where THE rope is.
As a career CEO, I want great lasting results — the fastest. I HATE wasting time. So I seek the Archimedes' Lever in all systems whether they're sales systems, operating systems, financial systems or bio-systems — like us humans.
Our mission by the time you go through this "Navy SEAL boot camp" of self-awareness ("ACE-10 Training") is that you will begin to have the self-awareness to move your Archimedes' Lever in your wants and/or discern wants that isn't from the real you but the ego-false-you. The latter level of self-awareness is an empowerment that I see very few people have, currently. This is world-class self-awareness.
However, remember, we did our part. You must continue to do your ACE part. To daily ace self-awareness through your relational-learning: Building great relationships with The Truth ("Transcendental"), The Self ("Intrapersonal"), Others ("Interpersonal"). Get these right — and life gets right. Gets these wrong — and life gets wrong. It's that simple.
"The truth must be a leader's best friend." -Dr. Henry Cloud, Renowned relational clinical psychologist
Lastly, we're not kidding about "Navy SEAL boot camp" of self-awareness. As you practice ACE, if you're really digging in, you will experience physiological soreness, emotional pain & blur (you will learn these herein). No different than Navy SEAL boot camp or martial arts boot camp. If you embrace real vulnerability, and if you're brave — you will cry, you will ball, you will grieve, you will discover the rage that you've been hiding with your "Instagram & Facebook" smiles & likes. You may sometimes even need to throw up. The masters of ACE will embrace utter vulnerability. If that's you, you will experience your greatest adventure — YOU. You will hear songs, poetry and power up fierceness and genius from inside you that you cannot even imagine now. You will look in the mirror and see a MIRACLE and you will see this in others! Or, if you choose to cowardly let The Good get in the way of The Great, you will drop out and by default, you will suffer your crawl in the barren desert. Choose the former — choose brave — ace self-awareness.
How deep can you know yourself with Bravely?
Answer: All the way into your epigenetics, genomics and biophysics.
After nearly two centuries of the masses buying into the self-sufficiency delusion, which started in the 1800's, rightfully called, The Age of Superstitions, when fecal eating and bloodletting were considered "good treatments"
right along with the current "helping" advice based on DIY that has culminated into the worst human suffering and failures the world has ever seen. Today's leading life scientists are calling for a renaissance of Know Thyself:
A broad and deep self-awareness of the systems around us, in us, and how other humans affect us. So to ace true self-awareness is NOT a selfish pursuit but a humble, brave, genius, scientific one.
"Science is the search for the truth." -Prof. Dr. Linus Pauling, two-time Nobel Prize recipient
Today, the wise knows, to ace self-awareness or not is only an option if you want to suffer disconnectedness aka loneliness — THE global epidemic — the contagion of hidden depression, immobility, chronic disease, anxiety & addictions ("The Big 6"). Plus suffer the hundreds of problems that The Big 6 downstream to like shallow, broken relationships and clinical stupidity. Self-sufficiency delusion is not cool, not sexy, it's stupid and suicidal.
I have decided to ace self-awareness to power my emotional intelligence, resilience & courage ("EIRC" pronounced Eric) — the No. 1 predictor of leadership parenting, health to success. Today's top leaders know that they must empower themselves, their family and team beyond just the canned rah rah & good wishes. Definitive research shows, there is nothing more empowering for your family and team than you gifting them Bravely to Know Thyself — and thus elevate their EIRC. The Norse name for Eric & Erica means "always ruler". Quite fitting don't you think?
So as you study the videos & study guides below — and practice ACE, we encourage you to heed the lesson of The Sailors & Row Boat: Slow down daily to truly speed up to getting to your ship. And untether THE rope of your shame nature which can only be done when you choose to practice ACE, daily.
Also, as you may have already discovered, Bravely doesn't limit you to just one relational expert in your relational-learning. While Bravely is the definitive source, we know you are too amazing, intricate and complex to be guided by just one person. The lack of complete definitive scientific resources is one reason why nearly 100% of status quo "helping" companies fail to help their users. Oppositely, in our ecosystem, you learn from many relational experts in 7 leading life sciences that are definitive. Integrated in a simple 3 step ACE practice for you to enjoy holistic success.
Lastly, the journey of embracing The Truth is also a journey of sifting out lies. As you may have seen in that "Self-Help" SHAM study on our website, amongst all the world's "helping" advice 98% don't meet scientific scrutiny and only 2% do. The world's data is doubling every 3 to 5 years. So searching for that 2% truth is like trying to find a treasure chest in the vast ocean. But that is exactly what Bravely does for our users, and we will NEVER stop this level of data integrity for you. Like the famed jeweler, Tiffany & Co. reports rejecting over 98% of all diamonds, and only presents the best for their discerning clients. Here at Bravely, we filter out MUCH fake science painted as "diamonds & gold". This intense scientific scrutiny is one of the cornerstones of Bravely since our founding. And we do not charge you for our labor & costs to bring you videos from our world's top relational experts. That's right! You will NEVER be charged for all the hundreds of videos on Bravely, including videos from yours truly.
We plan to launch our network app by Dec. 2017. If you choose our upgraded membership, you will only pay for our probing study guides — that's it. Our motto is best practice — at the best price to ace self-awareness.
Another part of your self-awareness is to know why other "helping" methods have failed you? The following is NOT to bash on "helping" companies but to renew and protect your hope for a better future here with Bravely.
If you're like all of us, you've tried and failed with other methods to upward mobilize your physical to financial wants. If so, please know that it was NOT YOU WHO FAILED. IT WAS THOSE METHODS THAT FAILED YOU.
Per the definitive research, the darkest secret of status quo "helping" companies is their 100% USER FAIL RATE. (See the study, Status Quo "Helping" Companies Don't Help But Harm). Their "helping" methods cause users to fail because they are NOT "evidence-science-based" as they claim.
Ever notice how these "success gurus" RARELY cite the specific research they claim or make said "research" easily accessible for you to study? Why, if what they espouse is "research-based"? Also, have you ever noticed that any research cited isn't supported with at least two other separate studies? The latter is par for course for any method to be called "scientific". Like the viral TED Talk on Power Posing. It was purported as "science-based". Yet, it was only "supported" by just one research study which has now been debunked by the original researchers. However, millions of innocent people have been hurt by this fake practice painted as a "scientific method".
Ask any of our members, look through all of our social media, and you will see that we NEVER shared that Power Pose video even when it became the hot Top 2 global TED Talk. That's how stringent our data filters are. We also never shared "Mindfulness" a repaint of failed 70's Zen. And now it's been debunked too.
As fake news hurts millions of people, fake science is hurting and killing billions of innocent children and adults.
Imagine if you were going into a serious operation, and the doctor told you the failure rate is over 96%. Would you be excited about the expected "success"? If you're a realist probably not — nor would I because the failure of the operation is almost certain. And research shows, status quo "helping" companies hide this catastrophic truth.
But what about the "success" testimonials that these "helping" companies parade around? Well, those who are literate about science would know to always plug in the "in spite of" ratio to any success claim. There is always a group who will succeed in spite of the method. This placebo group is 4% on average. Add this 4% factor into their 96% user failure rate = 100% FAIL. Now you can see how you NEVER had a chance to succeed with their antiquated methods.
Why would these companies do that? Do your research, because their target market is the sick and failures.
The more sick — the more money for "helping" companies . The more fail, the more "success" books… SOLD.
Sad, but true.
SO PLEASE KNOW: IT WASN'T YOU WHO FAILED. IT WAS THEM WHO FAILED YOU.
So why is Bravely so different? Just see for yourself on our website: EVERY part of our ACE practice is supported by the highest levels of real scientific research. Notice how we make these studies easy for you to access. Notice how our ACE method is not just supported by one high-level research but SEVERAL. And as of Jan. 2017, our method is supported by the world's largest neuroscience study. We HIGHLY encourage you to be forensic with every piece of research that we claim to support our methods, and always, use your life as your own laboratory. Please, "NEVER follow people's dogma." -Steve Jobs
We tested EVERY part of ACE on ourselves and among our beta users. We measure results not just over months, but YEARS. We have seen NO OTHER human optimization resource with our level of scientific integrity, thus our success predictability. We are serious about empowering your want for upward mobility from financial to physical, from your best leadership, health to success! However, as any other great technology, you must choose (or not) to "Accept The Terms" by following the exact ACE practice steps to insure your holistic success here.
Again, we encourage you to complete two study modules per week with two other brave peers! In fact, empower others too by having them create ACE study groups of 3 each. There is NOTHING better that you can do for others than to lead them to the No. 1 life hack: To ace self-awareness! OK, let's begin your most amazing adventure — YOU!
The first step to getting back and raising YOUR POWER is to ace self-awareness. This starts with understanding the life environment ("The Transcendental") that you are currently right now in. If someone has lived long enough, they know that life can have some awesome experiences. BUT also, for the vast majority, life can chew you up in problems, drown you in busy-busy, drag you down in broken relationships. From premature illness & death, to depression, anxiety & addictions, chronic disease, to lack of upward mobility in financial, physical, relational, mental, emotional & spiritual aspects of You. Such extreme opposite experiences. Life reminds me of a journey into the Amazon jungle.
Kyle Nolan went into the Amazon to get his want of access to new medicine. Yet, Kyle was brutally killed because he lacked self-awareness of the Amazon environment and he decided to DIY ("The Self-sufficiency Lie"). In his haste, he got bad data of an environment he never should of been in. A self-inflicted tragedy. Kyle caused suffering to himself, to his family and friends ("broken relationships"). They suffered from his lack of self-awareness. Every year there are so many people like Kyle who were met with brutal death, chewed up by fire ants or man-eating snakes, got lost and were never found in the Amazon because they were self-unaware. While my friend Frank who's been going into the Amazon jungle every year for the last twelve years always gets what he wants (catching big exotic fish). For over a decade, Frank has been having an awesome time discovering the Amazon and is able to return home safely to share his adventures with family and friends. What is the key difference between the Kyles vs. the Franks?
Answer: Frank is self-aware of his limitations in the Amazon environment. So brilliantly he doesn't practice self-sufficiency delusion like Kyle did. Thus Frank doesn't suffer bad data like the Kyles do. Frank chooses to harness the power of others in the form of a seasoned guide named Carlos. Then Carlos also networks with other seasoned Amazon guides to get the best data as to where new rivers were formed that bring new predators and new paths. New data as to current potential dangers — both foreign and domestic. Combined, Frank's humble acceptance of The Transcendental, Carlos + all those seasoned guides with the right up-to-date data, Frank is empowered with a clear MAP of the Amazon ("The Truth"), he had experts ("Others") and he knew his shortcomings ("The Self") in that Amazon environment ("Transcendental"), while the others like Kyle did not. It's that simple.
So year after year, Frank got what he wanted & reached his desired destinations, while those many others like Kyle sadly did NOT get what they wanted. Instead, lacking self-awareness, they caused huge self-inflicted suffering to themselves and their families. Aren't these real Amazon lessons great parallels to our own lives?
The enlightened can see how in our world today why billions of people suffer what they don't want: being chewed up by depression, anxiety & addiction, broken relationships, chronic diseases ("Powerless"). The imprisonment of lacking upward mobility in financial, physical, relational, mental, emotional and spiritual lives. See your life MAP:
Meet world-class, relational clinical psychologist, coach to several billionaires & Fortune 50 companies, multiple best-selling author, one of my Top 5 guides since 2004, Dr. Henry Cloud. He will show you his BREAKTHROUGH Relational Epidemiology MAP, revealing The 4 Corners of Your Relational World. Where NOT to go and where to go for your holistic success:
The root of all human problems is relational.